Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is the tendency toward feeling depressed, stressed, anxious, and sapped of all your energy, typically starting in fall when the sun starts setting earlier and rising later, shortening our days, and SAD carries on through the winter months, before letting up in the spring when the sun returns.
Most people either suffer through it, or take medication to help them along the way. Studies have shown that "light therapy" using daylight bulbs can help people too.
Let me share my story with you.
Though never officially diagnosed (or at least not to my memory, which isn't always accurate), I have long suffered from symptoms consistent with SAD. My depressions always worsened in the colder months, my anxiety gets the best of me, I struggle to keep a good sleep schedule, and I tend to gain weight, even when my diet doesn't change much.
When I was a teenager I figured it was because I was forced into a circadian rhythm that didn't match my natural one. Up at 5:30am to catch a 6:30 bus to school, seven hours of school where I was expected to sit still, be quiet, pay attention, take notes, and form some kind of social structure (which can be especially hard for those of us on the spectrum). I remember feeling so overwhelmed that I never actually used my locker for about three years straight because I didn't feel like I'd have enough time to go there, swap stuff, and then get back to the next class. So I literally carried all of my books, notebooks, folders, and writing stuff in my over-burdened backpack. Socially, school was not pleasant. I wasn't bullied because I was pretty much invisible. I chose to be a wallflower because it was better than being the target of bullying. I was right in that comfortable spot where I wasn't worth the popular kids' time, the skaters and the goths didn't notice me, and I was just a shy step above the unpopular kids who got the brunt of the school bullying. I had a small group of close friends, but I didn't do much after school. I had one or two friends I might have a sleepover with, but really, I wasn't the kid who had lots of friends or got invited to anything fun. At the end of the school day I'd have a long bus ride home, getting home at 4:30pm, where I'd take an hour to have some quiet me-time to recharge, and then get to work on homework or projects. In high school I also had a full time job that started promptly after school and my mom would pick me up at school, I'd change in the car, and clock in as soon as I arrived. Laws prevented me from working past 10pm on a school night, but I was still managing nearly full time hours while attending high school. (3:30-10pm 4-5 nights a week, plus full time hours on weekends). I'd come home from a 6+ hour shift and try to do my school work. Sometimes I wouldn't get to bed until 1 or 2am, but I'd have to be right back up again at 5:30 to catch the bus the next morning. Summers were so much easier. Sleep in, play outside, no social requirements, explore the woods, write stories and poems, catch tadpoles, go for long walks, let my imagination run wild.
I have the unfortunate added problem of having no cold tolerance. The cheap snowpants and kids boots and thin knit gloves we could afford when I was small didn't keep me warm. It was bulky and uncomfortable to go outside, and I always wanted to come right back in.
As an adult I have developed additional cold-intolerance issues. My fingers literally blister and crack if I go outside in winter. It doesn't matter if I wear gloves or not, I can slather on gallons of lotion, it doesn't prevent it, and it only happens when it's cold outside. I also get sick at the drop of a hat, and while the kids might bring home the latest virus from school, be sick for a day or two, and then go about their lives, when I catch it, I'm down and out for a week or more, and it lingers long after I should be back to normal. I don't have any immune system issues, so I can't really explain this. Needless to say, winter has long been my nemesis.
Why do I live in Minnesota then, you might ask? Because this is where my family lives, and my family is the most important thing in the world to me. So here I stay, close to my loved ones, suffering through the harsh Minnesota winters year after year. Maybe there's something about living here in the northern midwest. The winters are long and harsh, we get -40 frequently in January and February, and every spring just when you think it's about to warm up and thaw, we get another blizzard to replenish any show that melted during the brief warm spell.
Several years ago we started raising rabbits. I love raising rabbits. It's been a fun hobby. Expensive, but rewarding, despite the fact that I and one of the kids are allergic to rabbits. Allergy pills work 99% of the time, and we know we can't keep angora rabbits anymore (because they are the 1% that makes my throat swell shut even with allergy pills). All summer long I spend hours in the bunny barn, handling rabbits, breeding them, raising them, socializing them, talking to them, doing the chores, and just generally enjoying their company. But then the cooler weather comes, and I have to rely on my husband and my kids to do all the barn chores all winter. Let's just say they aren't as enthusiastic about it as I am. The truth of the matter is that the rabbits are truly my passion, and the rest of the household aren't as committed to them as I am, especially when it means bundling up and going out in the cold. Maybe I'm a little picky on how I want them cared for. I know that this one needs the water dish refilled twice a day because she drinks more, or that that one needs to have his food dish put in a certain place because he always tips it over and spills it, or that this one will be so excited for food that she will often close her own cage door just as you are about to pour the food in, making you spill it instead, while this other one you'll have to take her food dish out of the cage to refill or she'll knock the food scoop right out of your hand and not let you in the dish because she's just that happy to have food, all the time. I know that this one likes to push her water dish into her nest area when it's empty, so you have to go and retrieve it, and I know that this other rabbit hardly drinks anything at all, but still needs her water dish dumped out and refilled daily. Each rabbit has their own personality, and if you don't take the time to know them, you can't accurately take care of them.
This past fall I was lamenting to my husband about how much I hate relinquishing care of my rabbits to the kids. I dread it, because I know they aren't doing it to my standards, and I worry that my rabbits aren't getting the quality of care they deserve. My husband offered to buy me winter gear. I laughed it off at first. I remember bundling up as a child. It took forever, was uncomfortable, and I was still cold and miserable. But he went ahead and bought me winter gear anyway. It might sound basic, but I have a sweater, a hat, a pair of snow pants, thick socks, a pair of long underwear, waterproof gloves, and a scarf that I knitted myself.
Every day I put on my layers. Long underwear, with thick socks over them, then my regular pants, with my shirt tucked in. Then the sweater over top, followed by the snow pants with the sweater tucked in. I put my hair in a ponytail so it won't get in my face, and I put the hat and scarf on. Then the gloves go on just before the coat so they'll be properly tucked in the sleeves to prevent snow or cold wind from touching my hands or wrists. As I step out to the entryway, I slip my muck boots over the thick socks and put my snow pants over the top of the boots to prevent snow from getting in my boots. The rubber boots actually work quite nicely for winter boots when paired with the thick socks. It takes me about 5 minutes to get it all put on and it takes me 35-45 minutes to finish basic barn chores, before coming back in and dismantling the entire ensemble.
And you know what? It works! As long as I don't take the gloves off (and sometimes I do if I need to fiddle with something that requires more dexterity than a gloved hand can muster), I stay warm. On the coldest days, the -40 with -60 windchill days with blowing snow and whiteout conditions, I still feel like I'm in a sauna, but with an air conditioning vent right on my eyes - the only part of me that isn't bundled up. To be really honest, half the time I finish barn chores I have to go take a shower and change clothes because I'm sweaty. But I'm not cold, and that's what matters.
This winter is the first winter since I was in school where I have voluntarily left the house every day. I go out and I tend my bunnies most days (unless I'm sick or something comes up and I have a kid do it for me here and there). Perhaps not coincidentally, this is also the first winter in a long time that I have not been crippled by the effects of SAD. I find my outlook is upbeat, I look forward to spending time out in the barn every day. It gives me a short break from kids, and gives me a sense of purpose. I get to see the beautiful land we live on, the sunrises and sunsets (depending when I'm doing chores), the beautiful views, the rhythm of nature. I get to see the snow as it comes down, and I get to collect eggs from our birds. It's a nice time to clear my mind, collect my thoughts, and some days to work off frustration or just re-set myself.
I firmly believe that being active and being outside in nature are the keys to beating Seasonal Affective Disorder. Yes, my hands still blister and crack, but I found a product at Menards that heals it almost as fast as it comes on (Working Hands). I know I can't be absorbing additional Vitamin D, because I am thoroughly bundled while outside, but it seems to help anyway. It was worth the investment in winter wear. The most important parts seem to be the waterproof gloves and the long underwear.
In conclusion, if you suffer from SAD and you want to try alternative therapies to overcome or at least help relieve some of the effects, try buying yourself a pair of long underwear, bundling up, and heading outside for a little while every day.
Please note here that you should seek professional treatment, therapy, and/or medical intervention if you feel suicidal or are having serious difficulty getting through your day.
In addition to my newfound freedom of winter outdoors time, I also brought some of the tomatoes that were in buckets back inside last fall and have grow lights on them. Once a week I spend about 30 minutes in the "indoor garden" watering the plants and checking on them. This would likely count as "light therapy" by technicality, but I don't think 30 minutes once a week is enough to make a notable difference. It's definitely the long underwear.